Sexuality and Intimacy

Sex is a healthy and natural form of human expression. Sometimes situations such as negative or painful childhood or adult experiences interfere with healthy sexuality. This creates shame and confusion as well as possibly fear and avoidance. I provide sex positive therapy to help you discover the psychological, emotional and physical factors contributing to your sexual concerns and lack of fulfillment and how you can overcome them. 

Issues around sexual intimacy can arise from differences in libido, desires, fantasies, and arousal challenges. Many people have difficulty communicating their needs and having open dialogue about pleasure and sexual communication. Disconnection can also come from pressure to perform or achieve orgasm. This can get in the way from being in the present moment with your partner. Overcoming this can take time, both to explore and understand the contributing issues, and to practice allowing greater vulnerability.

What To Expect in a Typical Session?

Sex and intimacy problems are incredibly common. Sometimes, the same problem persists through every relationship we enter, which can be highly frustrating, and indicating that professional help might be needed to understand the origins or the pattern.  Together we will discuss the factors affecting your sexual well-being and develop customized strategies to help you deepen intimacy and address any conflicts. My practice is trauma informed, solution-focused and holistic, and I use evidence-based approaches to address a wide range of sexual issues (from dissociation during sex to communication challenges within relationships and more). The goal is to help you achieve a satisfying and fulfilling sex life.

Sex therapy can take place in individual sessions or couples counseling sessions, depending on your needs. Each session lasts anywhere from 45 to 60 minutes. 

Common Sex and Intimacy Challenges:

  • Difficulty communicating with partner, especially around sex: One of the most common reasons that sex starts to feel routine is through lack of communication. When you keep silent about an issue that is bothering you in the bedroom, it doesn't go away; it will simply come up again, in another form, which can then lead to resentment.

  • Fear of commitment: A person who has a fear of intimacy is often able to interact with another, at least initially. It's when the relationship grows closer that things begin to fall apart. Instead of connecting on an intimate level, the relationship is ended in some way, and possibly replaced by by a more superficial relationship.

  • Perfectionism: Underlying a fear of intimacy often lies a feeling that a person does not deserve to be loved and supported. This leads to the need to be “perfect” and the fear often works to push others away.

  • Difficulty expressing needs: Again, this may stem from feeling undeserving of another's support. Since partners are unable to "mind read," those needs go unfulfilled, which then confirms the person's feelings that he or she is unworthy.

We Can Work On:

  • Navigating Sexual Trauma

  • Concerns about Sexual Identity

  • Disconnection from your sexuality, Including Dissociation

  • Communication Difficulties Related To Sex

  • Anxiety Around Sex

  • Concern with Sexual Desire

  • Navigating Sexual Health Issues that are Impacting your Relationship

  • Exploration of Sexual Orientation or Gender Identity in a Safe Space

How therapy Can Help:

Many people find discussing their sexuality both stressful and uncomfortable. My goal is to provide a healing environment where you can talk about openly without shame. Doing so gives you the opportunity to formulate your sexual identity, achieve personal growth, and feel more comfortable with your sexuality. I use a variety of therapeutic approaches to help you navigate sexual challenges, including:

  • Dialectical Behavioral Therapy (DBT): DBT teaches coping skills to manage stress, regulate emotions, and improve relationships. During sex therapy, DBT can help you navigate intense emotions related to sexual issues or trauma. It has also been found to be beneficial for individuals or couples dealing with emotional dysregulation that impacts their sexual relationships.

  • Mindfulness Techniques: Mindfulness techniques in sex therapy involve bringing your full attention to the present moment during sexual activity without judgment. This practice helps individuals become more attuned to their own body sensations and emotional needs, as well as those of their partner. It’s particularly useful for addressing issues like performance anxiety or difficulties achieving arousal by reducing stress and enhancing relaxation.

  • Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR): EMDR mitigates the effects of trauma by countering shame and allowing for adaptive information processing. This adds new information to the otherwise stuck trauma narrative, such as “I’m broken”. When a trauma survivor gets stuck in processing because they don’t know why they shut down during sex with their non-abusive partner, we might add new information about why that happened, normalizing the experience around why their body behaved as it did. This then un-sticks the process and allows them to resolve the distress.

  • Sex Positive Therapy: Sex positive therapy is an approach that is particularly beneficial for individuals or couples exploring sexual orientation, gender identity, or non-traditional relationship structures, promoting a fulfilling sex life free from judgment. This framework is essential in addressing feelings of shame, guilt, or inadequacy related to sex. 


It takes a lot of courage to reach out for help regarding sexuality, and many have been suffering for years. I provide a safe and affirming environment to help you feel supported in exploring any concerns you might have related to sex and/or intimacy, and hopefully allow you to feel more comfortable when communicating about sex. 

Whether you’re facing personal sexual concerns or navigating complexities within your relationship, I’m here to support your journey toward a fulfilling sex life.